what to do to save your artists life

so my artist's life has been in limbo
trapped in a 15 passenger van full of in-laws i love
and we've wandered from kid camp to family reunion
and my artist has been driving and fixing meals and cleaning up
and being, in other ways, responsible
for other things and people.
and now, today, these are the first days for my artist to return.
and i have wavered on the fence of trying to be a "normal" person--
and going back work and giving up this art dream once an for all
but then
i called an art friend
who wavers on the same edge of respectable suburban lady as me
and she said,
"meet me quick. i must have an in and out burger"
and i met her.
so the first thing to do is have an artist on speed dial who wavers, just like you, on the edges of impossible possibilities or possible impossibilities depending on the the shades.
and the second thing to do is eat good bad food together.
and the third thing to do is tell the truth between french fries.
and the fourth thing to do is hear her tell hers.
and the fifth thing to do is to take out your art notebook or journal or leftover receipts and a pen or a pencil or a marker or a crayon.
and the sixth thing to do is let yourself make marks.
and the seventh thing to do is talk out loud about stuff you could do--things you could count--easy ways to give your artist some air to breathe.
and the eighth thing to do is to commit to some easy way to play art.
and the ninth thing to do is to write down your commitments and those of your friend.
and the tenth thing to do is promise to check in.
and then you hug, you thank your friend for the good bad food and life giving conversation. you get into your own cars and head toward your own obligations.
and then you go home and stumble.
and then you find suziblu who inspires you
and you send the link to your friend
and then you start.
you find your way.
you begin again.
you remember, what you do is important because you do it.
and you declare yourself unemployable.
and you stop wasting time on resumes.
and you start making marks--even marks no one will ever see that will never make any money or amount to anything or lead anywhere or matter to anyone but you.
and you make them.
and it gives you so much joy--
the play of it--
that you write words about it and you post them for other people who might one day need to trip into saving the life of their artist
and you press the magic orange publish button
and you check the link
and you prove to yourself you exist--
at least virtually
and you are alive
at least virtually
and that is enough--
showing up in cyberspace is enough
and if you do enough on-line living
well, it might just be enough life
for your artist
to live
to remain alive
ooooooooh, to remain alive.


make your marks.